Trapped

Tonight I sit in a prison
of my own making.
Held in by invisible bars that only I can see.

In my cage I wear a straitjacket of morals.
A responsible untouched soul
Boring, dull, unattractive.

On the outside, stand those who I envy.
People who understand what it is to truly live,
from one encounter to the next.

Tonight they mozy around, moving freely from one location to the next.
Neither caring where the next move is coming from or where the next stop is.
And I tag along, in my self-professed exile.

Tonight they wear costumes, hiding their true-selves from the world.
Masked and disguised from all of the world.
and I too, wear a costume, so show the world something I am not.

I'm a wounded bird.
Unable to fly, unable to soar,
unable to be fully free.

Free from self doubt and self loathing,
Free from what it means to be responsible,
Free from what it is to be an adult.

Tonight, the free inhabit the town,
making noises and causing havoc whichever way they do go
and I will sit idly by in my cage and do nothing.

I have written this sentence for myself
alone in self-exile with no one to blame but me
Held under a lock and key of dignity.

Perhaps one day soon I will leave this cage
but for now I sit and plan my escape,
I must fight to be free.

A Lament for Her

if you think this may be for you, you're probably right...

She sits near me now, as my heart flutters with anticipation.
That timid laugh, a joke told and ideas exchanged.
The raw intelligence of a great mind, yet the strong beliefs of a well-grounded female
She has left me speechless at her looks.
The party has started to die down and I am still dumbfounded.
She turns to leave before flashing the smile
that would absolutely light up my life.
I absorb the moment, yet say nothing.

The long night transitions into
cold morning as I am left alone again.
I stir in bed reliving the moment,
thinking of the words that wouldn't come.

O, how I pine for her!
She is the distant light leading me into the shore of a relationship.
All that needs to me said is still inside of me.
To sale toward her and be one with her,
I must throw off the covers of shyness and tell her how I truly feel!

What Have I Become?

An empty shell stands on the sea shore
Once a vessel of hopes and dreams,
a vessel of thoughts and ideas,
now just another lonely shell
for the passerby to look and and say
'Wow, that is neat, I wonder where it came from?'

Well, it boils down like this.
The history of that shell can be traced back for many years.
The shell has been scrutinized and picked on,
successful and intelligent,
Funny and humorous,
talented and gifted...

But what is left now?
Nothing
Nothing but an empty shell that stands for everything it was
Now what stands there is a shell, of a man
who has failed himself and the others around him.
This is the story of he has has fallen.
This story is mine!

Welcome

Hello, what's up, welcome to the beginning
of the rest of your life.
I hope you enjoyed the journey up until now
because now life moves at a speed you probably aren't ready for.

Along the way, you'll love, learn, and fail.
You'll work, and work, and work some more.
You'll find happiness, encounter sadness, defeat loneliness
but also fall victim to hubris.

But that shouldn't get you down!
You have plenty to see and do,
that is unless you die early of heart failure
or diabetes, or something else.

You see those guys who stand over there, they are your new bunch of friends.
Most of them will be cool, some will appear cool and turn out to be douchebags
while others may start as people you despise, but you grow to care for.
But don't forget the others... no, those who were with you on the way here.
Werther or not you've seen them 10 minutes or 10 years ago.
Those were the best days of your life, live them like they were just that

Appriciate those who follow you.
Realize that it is not just you that you live for.
You are here to count for anyone before or after you.
Seems like a big responsibility huh?

But all you need to remember in the end is this.
Life is great, just don't let it bog you down.
It's not the end of the world...
just wake up and realize that today is the next chance for you to make a difference!

Frozen

Encased by time, and here you stand
frozen to the ground.
Unmoving like a statue, built to stand the test
of time.

Time moves like a glacier,
cold, slowly and unforgiving.
Those who get in it's way are only added
to the masses.

So here you stand, frozen in time.
Neither going, nor staying.
Neither living or dead.
He's hoping you stay around long enough to make
a difference.

Guilt

A heavy yoke of guilt crashes on my back,

I’m not a better man, so I let it consume me

The pressure eats away at my shoulderblades

As I am torn between right and wrong

I act as the crux... the untouched soul.

A virgin to the feelings of guilt

Unsure of how to react and realizing that the worst

Just might be on the upcoming horizon

With each moment it shifts its weight

To and fro.

The yoke leaves me in a state of constant

Flux as it relates to the balance of right and wrong

But then I look into the sunset and realize…

This is not a burden I carry alone.

Others carry it with me and it is those who survive this journey

Who I may call my friends.